Gena in gelukkiger tijden
Finally some quiet – finally some moments to stop and think about all that has happened since Jan.12 2010. I am tired – physically tired and my spirit is tired. I am in our rehab centre – just beside the hospital. Today I am trying to stay away from the hospital – trying to put some distance from me and the sad realities living over there. My body is here on the couch and yet my mind is there with the children. I see Johanne lying on her bed-seven years of age and she is in a coma. The wall that fell on her head pushed a bone in her skull into her brain and to most people she is dead. The doctor asked me to tell the grand-mother-Meritanne- that they cannot do anything for her and that there is no hope for Johanne to recover. I told him that I would tell the grand-mother that it was unlikely Johanne would recover BUT I would not say that there is no hope. Where there is life there is hope and how could I take that little hope from this loving mother? How could I? Meritanne has been with her grand-daughter day and night and she knows that she is very sick. She is not expecting a full recovery BUT she sees her alive when many are dead. She has hope that she might recover – even a little bit. Hope is not the same as expectation. Who has the right to take away Meritanne’s hope? No one has that right. I understand this doctor – he is a kind man that came to help. He does not want to give the family false hope. I told him he does not have to worry about this BUT we will not take her hope. She is a smart woman and she is realistic. She is a Haitian mother and the Haitian people are a people of hope. Good for her. I share in her hope.
And what of Johanne- one eye open and the other closed shut and who knows what is going on in her mind. When you talk to her and kiss her soft skin, I liked to believe she is aware of it and that the blinking of the eyelid is her way of saying that she is indeed listening. Meritanne takes comfort from the fact that the “white doctors” – Norma and I (neither of us doctors!) are giving her child so much attention and that we BELIEVE that Johanne is still very much with us. I told everyone in the ward that we have to put a lot of attention on Johanne- that Johanne has to know how much we want her to come out of this coma. Other mothers give encouragement and everyone says the same thing – thousands died, Johanne is alive. There is a reason!
Johanne is one of seven kids. The others are ok – the house destroyed and they are all living in a nearby park. They lost all they owned. The grand-mother wonders what will happen if Johanne is discharged. I wonder the same but for now she will not be going anywhere as she is too unwell. Probably you dear Johanne will not be discharged as for sure your family cannot take care of you in the rubble or under the four sheets that is now your home. Dear dear Johanne, in a moment your life is changed forever and there is no point in even beginning to wonder why. I hope, I so dearly hope that we can help you and your family. I hope. I hope. I hope for so much!
From where I sit, my mind takes me to the bed of Meleanda – five years of age and immobile in her bed. She was trapped in her house – stuck under a door and debris. Her family pulled her out and she was rushed to hospital and put on Oxygen. She was 10 days on Oxygen and now she lies on her bed – ubable to move, unable to talk, unable to eat- very like Johanne but Meleanda is not in a coma. She is aware when the nurse comes to give her medicine and her little body tenses in fear. Her Mam, Clarice tells me that Meleanda responds with her eyes when she talks to her. Meleanda tries to move but cannot. The father is a school teacher – he used to work in two different schools – one in the am and one in the pm. Both schools destroyed.
Lots of people are always hungry in Haiti. Before the earthquake many people were lucky if they ate once a day. Now can you imagine the scene – no house, no clothing, no money, no food- for thousands and thousands of people. Mothers in our hospital have no money to feed themselves while they are with the sick children. They worry about their other children that are sleeping in the parks and streets. Can you imagine the stress of these people? Can you imagine the pain? Can you imagine the sadness? World- wide people are trying to help and this is so good. Say a prayer for Johanne and for Meleanda. They are only two and there are many more like them. But I have put them in your head and if you keep them there I believe it will be good for them.
Maybe ye have room for another little kid. His name is Stevenson and he is a bright and sparky three yr old. He had one leg amputated(below the knee) and yet he is still able to smile and play with his little car in his hospital bed. To see him smiling there, you would never imagine all that he has been through. His grandmother is not smiling. She sits there with a sad and tired face. When I talk with her I realize that she is worried about what and will happen when she has to leave the hospital. She has seven kids, two grandchildren and she is the one supporting all of them as she has no husband to help. Oh this woman! How can I describe the sadness, the quiet sadness that did not find the words to come out. When we spoke I felt I wanted to take her in my arms and tell her that she was not alone. “What will I do when I take him home? I have no home- we are sleeping on the street and it will not be good for him because at night it gets cold and he is already fragile. What will I do? I have no idea.”
I told her, I was going to tell her story and maybe I could help. She looked at me and in a very quiet way she said “ if you were able to do this for me, this would be so so good and I would give thanks to God. Maybe God brought you to be because you are the first person that has asked me about my home and maybe you will be able to help me. I will be so so thankful if you can help me because I do not know what I am going to do”. This beautiful woman that could be my sister, or my cousin or my mother! Her name is Ghislaine.
I spoke to some of the foreigners that are staying in our grounds and I asked them if they can give me their tents when they leave next week. They said yes so that means I have some tents for some of the patients that will soon be leaving. For now I will be able to give Ghislaine a tent for her little boy and I will give her some money to help her out. I cannot give her life back but we will help her as we can. We have over twenty children with amputations in our hospital and probably as many adults. The statistics say that so far there are at least 2000 amputees since the earthquake. We have a lot of work to do! We do what we can and we are grateful for the thousands of people helping us do what we can do.
